[Debra chuckles]
That was really a great dinner, huh?
Yeah, yeah.
- Happy Anniversary. - Aww.
Hey, you know what I was thinking?
Since this is our tenth anniversary
why don't we let the kids stay
at grandma's and grandpa's all night
if you know what I mean?
Hey, hey, we could watch our wedding video.
I guess you don't know what I mean.
No.
- Come on. Come on. - Why?
Why? Why?
Well, for one thing, watching our wedding video
might make tonight seem like our honeymoon.
Gimme. Sit down. You don't know how to use this.
You never did, really.
Can we fast-forward through the chicken dance, please?
Unless this turns you on..
[scatting "Chicken Dance"]
You can save that for later.
- Hmm. - Oh.
Oh, see, I love this. Isn't this romantic?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Right.
- Oh, look who I get. - Oh.
[Debra] 'Oh.'
[crowd cheering on TV]
What, did you hit something?
- Did you hit something? - I know. No, no.
It's still going.
Then-then why am I seeing football?
- I-I don't know. - Where did our wedding go?
[theme music]
Well, something must be wrong here.
Oh, my God.
You taped football over my wedding.
- Alright, please-- - What did you do, Ray?
What the hell did you do?
No.
Come on, don't get excited.
Oh, wait, wait, wait. Look at that.
What? It's football. It's still football, Ray.
Yeah, but it's the Bills-Giants Super Bowl.
I don't care. You give me that.
Oh, my God. Look at this.
My God, it's the whole thing, Ray.
The kids must have done that.
Oh, right. Oh, yeah. The kids tape football, Ray.
The last thing they put in the VCR was lemon chicken.
See, I'd never do that, because I love your--
Shut up! I want my wedding. This is football.
Alright, could we just stay calm?
No, you give me my wedding back.
I don't know what happened. I guess the tape wasn't marked--
Oh, the tape wasn't marked correctly?
You don't think that tape was marked correctly?
What is this, Ray? What is this big white label
that says, "Our Wedding" in gold trim?
Did it always say that?
Why would you use this tape?
I don't know. The game was nine years ago.
Maybe, you know, the guys might have been over
and if the game was getting good
somebody said, "Hey, you should be taping this."
And you know me, I was just trying to be a good host.
I said, "Hey, that's a good idea, someone else ."
Hey, hey, you know something, I have an idea.
Next time, if you have something on tape
that you like and you want to save it
you-you see this, you see the tab right there?
You just pop it out, you pop the tab out.
And then, then the machine knows
"Oh, you must really like that.
Y.. I won't tape over it. I won't."
You just pop it out. You pop the tab out.
[sighs]
Okay, hmm, ten years. That's enough.
[instrumental music]
Raymond.
- Oh, good morning. - Everything alright, dear?
Yeah, yeah, just the, the anniversary thing
was so exciting, you know
I-I needed a break. That's all.
Eggs, Marie.
Scrambled.
And they've been looking a little pale lately.
Stop holding back on the yolks.
I'm not holding back.
I'm on to you.
Daddy wants his yolks.
You get every yolk, Frank.
What possible reason would I have
for prolonging your life?
Is Robert up yet?
You mean hopalong?
He was gored by a bull, Frank.
He can't help it.
When's he going to get rid of that, that walker?
I mean, I got stuck behind him twice today
the stairs and the bathroom.
Thanks for shoving past me on the steps, dad.
You were in the the fast lane.
Get over to the right.
Robert, did you find him?
Bad news, Ray. The guy's in prison.
- Prison? - Who? Who's in prison?
James Lemus, the guy who videoed Ray's wedding.
He went from doing wedding videos
to honeymoon videos
without the consent of the honeymooners.
What about his old tapes? I got to get my original.
All gone, Raymond, impounded and destroyed.
Okay, then. Mom, can I live here?
Of course you can, dear.
What did Debra do?
She's having a bad reaction
to me accidentally taping over our wedding video.
Oh, my God.
Holy crap!
I, I don't understand.
What would you tape over your wedding?
Football.
Sports?
It was the Super Bowl, ma.
It doesn't matter if it was a super-duper bowl.
It's still sports.
I know.
Hey, good work, Ray.
Now when some broad starts yapping..
[in high voice] "You're never romantic!"
Guys everywhere can say, "Hey, you think I'm bad?
At least I didn't pull a Ray Barone."
[laughing]
I must say, I'm surprised, Raymond.
You're not usually so thoughtless
and inconsiderate.
He gets this from you, Frank.
At least I didn't pull a Ray Barone.
Alright. I'll see you.
Where are you going?
I don't know.
Maybe walk by the river.
You have to make this right, Raymond.
Well, the tape's gone, ma.
What do you want me to do
staple our wedding photos together
and make a flip book?
Well, I'll tell you what I would like
if I were Debra.
I'd like it if you were Debra.
Oh, Frank.
What, what? Tell me, ma, what?
Renew your wedding vows.
Yeah, and then you can videotape that.
- That's a great idea, ma. - Hey, reenactment.
That's just like what my Civil War buddies do.
What your Civil War buddies do
is get drunk and pee outside.
You know what the Southerners do?
Oh, stop it, Frank.
We're talking about a beautiful thing, a wedding
a renewal of commitment and love, Frank.
Love. You understand love?
By all means, Ray, hurry up and renew this.
I-I don't know, ma. It all seems kind of--
You have taken Debra's wedding away.
And no matter what people may say about her
she's still a woman.
And you don't take that away from a woman.
The only thing you need to worry about
is if she ever forgives you for what you've done.
But I-I guess she'll like it
but I don't know anything about this renewal stuff.
Leave it all to me.
I'll handle all the arrangements.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Yes, I would do that.
Okay, alright.
Oh, uh, Marie
I would like to renew my breakfast order..
...eggs!
Oh, good. I'm-I'm glad you're up.
I got some good news, and I got some bad news.
The bad news is that if you like being mad at me
you're out of luck, m'lady.
The good news is
I couldn't get the tape back
which I know sounds like bad news
but actually is good news
because if that tape existed
we wouldn't be able to get married again.
What are you doing?
I've been-I've been thinking about it all night.
Let's renew our vows.
What?
Look, I took your wedding away from you
and-and-and I know you're a woman
and you don't take that away from a woman.
So, let me give it back to you.
You know, just forget it, Ray.
The tape is gone. I'll get over it.
I know you will, but this will be faster.
Come on, let's do this. I feel bad.
I was thoughtless and-and-and careless
and I want to make it up to you.
And it's our tenth anniversary.
We should do something special.
We'll invite friends over, we'll get dressed up
have music and flowers
and, oh, you won't have to do a thing.
And-and a priest, we'll get one of those.
And we'll write new vows.
Then we'll videotape those
and we'll pop the tab out of that right away.
I just, I want to do this, because..
...because.
I had a good idea?
It's wonderful, Ray.
I mean, you would really get up in front of people
a-and recite new vows for me?
Sure. Yeah, yeah.
Okay, this is good.
I'm so glad you're happy.
But you know what? I just thought of something.
What?
Your mom's gonna want
to plan the whole thing.
- And that would be bad? - Ray.
Yeah, I know. It's bad. It's bad.
So you're doin' this all yourself, huh, Ray?
Yeah, yeah, Debra wants me to.
It doesn't count unless I go through hell.
Stupid. Stupid renewal.
So what do you got so far?
Uh, I'm working on a motif.
Oh, motif. How fancy.
Yeah, they talk about it in here.
Where'd you get all these wedding magazines?
From the newsstand. It was so embarrassing.
I had to buy some porn just to even it out.
"The best weddings have a centralized theme."
Hey, you know what would be great? Cupid.
- Cupid? - Yeah, yeah.
It's a little naked angel.
You know. He shoots you. Ah, it's cute.
- That's a horrible motif. - What? It's perfect.
He can be flying around the room.
Hey, you know what you could do?
You could dress up the twins.
You put little wings on their back.
- They'd come by-- - Alright, stop it.
No. It's not gonna be Cupid.
That's lame.
Alright, so what's your brilliant idea?
An English garden.
- English garden? - That's right, yeah.
Whoo, whoo. Hey.
Party. English garden.
Hey, it's classy, you Neanderthal.
"It brings sophistication
and elegance to any party." Okay?
Yeah, what does Cupid bring?
A bow and arrow and a bare ass.
Okay, great.
It goes with my whole idea of a Sunday tea.
What do you mean, tea? There's no dinner?
No, it's a tea.
That's it. There's gonna be hors d'oeuvres.
Okay, so your motif really is
"I'm a cheap bastard."
Hey, come on, let's go. Let's go. Let's move.
Put the game on. It's almost time.
Hey, hey, you're another two.
Did you get an invitation?
Yeah, yeah, I got it.
So, Robert, how's your ass?
Upper thigh.
[laughs] Upper thigh, sure.
Yeah, yeah. Never mind that.
Never mind. Are you comin'?
- If I have to. - Yes, y-you have to.
Why don't you renew the bachelor party?
- You're coming. - Is there food?
- Hors d'oeuvres. - Hors d'oeuvres? I'm out.
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
Some hors d'oeuvres are good. What are you planning?
Well, a couple things, you know, like, uh
they got those chicken-on-a-stick things.
- Ooh, satay. - 'Yeah.'
Hey, hey, Ray, can we get those stuffed mushrooms?
I don't know. You like those?
You got 'em, I'll eat 'em.
What about for those of us who have a bit of a sweet tooth?
And a bit of a fat stomach?
I-I'm trying, I'm gonna go with
these chocolate-dipped strawberries.
Chocolate and strawberry.
That's an excellent flavor combo.
- Yeah. - Oh, my God.
Yeah. Yeah, you know what I've seen?
The strawberries wearing the little tuxedo shirts.
Come on, really? They don't do that.
Sure they do. I-it's dark chocolate all around, right?
With a white-chocolate front and little buttons and a bowtie.
- Really? - That's adorable.
Why don't you three dip each other in chocolate?
Hey, hey, hey, you know what, what about
like, a little chocolate top hat?
- Oh, that's great. - That's a good idea.
- That could work. - Like chocolate clothing.
Excellent, yes.
Or what if we use
a different berry?
How about a kiwi?
[all] Yeah.
Raymond, what is this?
- Hey, I need that. - What is this?
It looks like an invitation to your renewal ceremony.
Yes, that's what it is.
I thought I was supposed to take care
of all of this, Raymond.
So is that your RSVP?
["Close To You" instrumental]
Hey, Gerard. Gerard, you know anything else?
["Smoke On The Water" instrumental]
Okay, stop. Go back to the other one.
The other one's better.
["Close To You" instrumental]
Ray, Ray.
Ray!
Ray, did you see this?
Huh? Did you see the strawberries?
They have regular ties instead of bowties.
Yes, I know. That's what I ordered.
Well, nobody told me.
[laughs] Hi.
Frank, make way for my lasagna.
No, no.
Mom, I don't, I don't need lasagna.
Please. I have hors d'oeuvres.
Well, then why don't I just kill myself?
And then-then, where's the florist?
I ordered lilies of the valley.
I don't see any lilies of the valley.
I see a pansy of the family.
Ha-ha, funny. Come on, stop.
Raymond, you really have done a wonderful job.
Thank you, Father Hubley.
Looks like a lot of work.
You must have really screwed up.
Oh, it's pretty.
Yeah, can you believe daddy pulled this off
all by himself?
- Hmm. Yes, I did. - Yeah.
Alright, everybody, shall we get started?
["Close To You" instrumental]
That's enough, Gerard.
I would like to welcome all of you
to Raymond and Debra's beautiful home.
[giggles]
We are gathered here today..
...to witness a renewal of love and commitment
between husband and wife.
And in our presence and in the sight of God
they will now share vows they each have written.
Go ahead, Raymond.
Ladies first.
Alright.
- Debra? - Okay.
Um, well, when, when Ray first came to me
with-with this idea, I was very touched.
[exhales] I'm really glad to have this chance to tell people
how I feel about you.
[clears throat]
Oh, boy.
I don't know how well I've always lived up
to my vow to love, honor, and cherish you.
So just in case I haven't always shown it
I want you to know that I do.
With all my heart, I do.
And I want to add something else to that list.
[clears throat] Alright.
And that is to thank you.
For the kids, for your love
for our life together..
...I thank you.
Raymond.
Um..
...you're welcome.
Your vows, Raymond.
I am so happy to be here on this occasion.
Love is in the air.
Today I consider myself..
...the luckiest man..
...on the face of the earth.
Okay, I forgot the vows.
But that doesn't mean that I don't care about you
because of that, and-and because I taped
football over our wedding video.
You taped football over your wedding video?
[indistinct chatter]
Yes, I made a mistake.
You said you were going to recite vows to me.
Okay, I know, I know, but we had your vows
and, oh, they were beautiful.
And, and I didn't really hear 'em all
because I was in my head going "Idiot, idiot, idiot, idiot."
But, but, you know, luckily
Robert videotaped 'em, and we can enjoy 'em later.
You never told me to tape it.
Okay, but, but, but..
Honey, look at all the decorating that I did here.
I.. T-there's stuffed mushrooms here
and, see, look, there's flowers everywhere
and there were supposed to be lilies of the valley here and..
But the-the napkins, they match the tablecloth.
I did that.
Alright.
I'm sorry.
Lilies of the valley?
Yeah, that's your favorite flower, right?
You remembered?
Yeah, I ordered 'em, but the damn florist
he didn't bring it.
You remembered my flower.
Kiss the bride.
Kiss her. Kiss her now.
[applause]
By the way, i-if I may ask..
...what game was it?
It was the '91 Super Bowl. Bills and Giants.
Oh, good game, good game.
I know, I know. I still have it on tape.
But we're not, that's not why we're here.
We're not here for that.
[instrumental music]
I'm so excited.
The famous last-second field goal.
Even though I know what happens, I'm so excited.
Keep it down, my friend. Keep it down.
This was the greatest moment of my life.
Shut up. H-here it comes.
I-I do.
Oh!
Why am I watching a wedding?
Bring back my Super Bowl.
[all] Come on.
He missed it, alright? We know he missed it.
[Ray] 'Hey, we know what happens, alright?'
- 'I forgot.' - 'We know how this ends.'
[theme music]